Sunday, February 28, 2010

Last week of shots!

Okay, I know you are so sick of hearing about shots and how many are left, but I am really excited about this. I can't even tell you how nice it's going to be not to have to have a shot every day! It has definitely been well worth it, but here are a few items I will enjoy:
  • Hopefully getting sensation back in parts of my butt, hips, and legs. They are numb, but it feels like it's asleep and sore. It's a weird feeling that I don't love.
  • No more bleeders! I'm so sick of laying on my stomach for 10 minutes and trying to hold a piece of tissue on my injection site to make sure there is no more blood.
  • I will no longer have "braille bum." This is the condition you get when you have a shot everyday and each new shot creates a braille bump on your skin. I'm pretty sure my messages have read: "No more shots!", "This side is done, move to the other side." and so forth.
  • I can finally turn off the alarm on my phone that reminds me to have a shot, and reminds Ryan that he has to stop working out to come give me the shot. What's life going to be like when we don't have this interruption anymore?

Anyway, those are just a few things I'm excited for this week. FOUR MORE SHOTS! That's it!

Needle count: 92
Acupuncture: 138

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

9 days and counting!

I only have 9 evil progesterone shots left and I will be freed from their evil ways! I can't even wait until its over. We finally called the doctor's office yesterday and asked if we could move up my shot time from 7 to 5. I can't believe we didn't do that sooner. Now Ryan can give me all my shots and I don't have to run around Utah Valley looking for somebody to do it for me. Honestly, this can't be over soon enough. But just think, no more shots in bathrooms, in the parking lot, friends houses, relatives houses, all the awkward places I've had to have my shots.... NO MORE! Yeah! Let the countdown begin!

Needle count: 87
Acupuncture: 138

Monday, February 15, 2010

Infertile Myrtle's journey

I feel I have left out a lot of my life on this blog. You have only seen the in vitro portion of our lives. What was it like before that? Well, this is what it was like.

Ryan and I started trying to conceive in 2007. I was so ready to be a mother. My heart yearned to hold my baby in my arms. I can honestly say there was nothing I wanted more than to be a mother. We started trying and nothing was happening. My cycles were long (which when you're trying is awful). I would take a pregnancy test every month and cry every month when it was negative. Finally in December 2007, I went to my OB/GYN and expressed my concerns. He immediately put me on Clomid. I did that for 2 months with no side effects and somewhat shorter cycles, but unfortunately it didn't work.

I went back to the doctor and he added metformin (Glucophage) to my regimen. The metformin made me horribly sick. I remember working in the hospital and having to run to the bathroom because I was so sick from the meds. I did this for 3 months hoping it would bring me my wish. It did not.

In July 2008, we decided it was time for a reproductive endocrinologist, someone who specializes in fertility/infertility. He did some blood tests on me (FSH, LH, blood glucose), all of which were normal. He also ordered a hysterosalpingogram to make sure my fallopian tubes were free of debris. I was in fact, free of debris. He kept me on Clomid but upped to dose to 100 mg (2 tablets daily). When that didn't shorten my cycle, he upped the dose again to 150 mg. Yikes! My vision was blurry, my brain felt funny, and I had headaches from hell. It just was not ideal at all. I think I did this for about 2 or 3 months/cycles. Since it wasn't working I begged him to put me on another medication. He did. I started taking Femara. This med actually made me have a 28-day cycle and I knew I ovulated on it. I went in for an ultrasound around ovulation and sure enough, I had plenty of beautiful follicles ready to break free from my ovaries. We opted to do an hCG trigger shot at this point to release the eggs and time our love accordingly. Unfortunately this didn't work.

The next month, December 2008, we decided it was time for a more aggressive approach. This time we did Femara and IUI, or intrauterine insemination. It's where they put a little catheter through your cervix and injected your husband's specially prepared man juice straight into your uterus. We had hopes that our problem could have just been a cervix that wasn't allowing the sperm to get through. This obviously didn't work and was actually very devastating. It completely broke my heart and my spirit. I don't think I left the house for days. I felt like we were trying so hard and getting no results. It was exhausting. After this, my emotions just couldn't handle fertility treatments for a while. I needed a break. I think Ryan probably needed it too. We decided it was time for a little love named Bella to be a part of our lives. Bella definitely has brightened our lives. We love our little baby dog, even though she's not a baby anymore.

We kind of kept things on hold for a while, a long while actually. Ryan went to Ecuador for a month and during that time I went to the doctor to see if they would do a laparoscopy on me. They didn't want to do it for some reason and they just put me back on Clomid. Bad idea. I left the doctor's office in tears and complete hysterics and no way to call my husband since he was in a different country and I had no phone number to reach him. I believe he must have been inspired by the spirit to contact me because he called me that afternoon and I just bawled and he just listened. My heart still hurt. I felt defeated once again. I did the Clomid for 1 more round and immediately gave up. We started to fill out the papers for adoption, but it just never felt right. This is when we decided to go to the University of Utah. From our very first visit they were ready to find out what was wrong. It was reassuring, but still frustrating. My cycles by this point were 60+ days. They ended up putting me on Provera to induce my period so we could start fresh with my cycles. For Ryan, came the test with the hamster eggs. This is where the blog picks up. And now look at where we are.

I feel we have gone through much heartache and frustration and now we have been blessed in multiple ways. We are so thrilled beyond belief to be expecting our children later this year. We know God works in mysterious ways and in ways I will never understand. Never once did I feel in vitro wasn't what we were supposed to be doing. When we started to fill out our paperwork for adoption earlier in 2009, it never felt like we were in the right place doing the right thing. When we decided to do in vitro, I felt blessed with peace and comfort. I knew it was what we were supposed to do.

Thank you so much for sharing in our journey. Your love and support has meant so much to Ryan and myself.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

In Cold Stone Creamery

Okay, this one was bad. We went out to dinner to celebrate the NCLEX with our friends Jacob and Amber last night. After dinner, Ryan wanted something sweet, so we made our way to Cold Stone. Of course, it came time for my shot. Thank goodness they have a family restroom, I think. It was totally embarrassing walking in the tiny bathroom together as the other patrons probably looked on in horror. Ryan gave me my shot, which hurt this time. I quickly made him leave the bathroom so at least we didn't walk out at the same time. Awkward! After the shot, we walked around the mall for a little bit and then went home. On the way home my butt starting to BURN and hurt really bad. I was really uncomfortable the entire way home. As soon as we got home I went to get in the bathtub to see if I could soothe my aching bum. Blood everywhere! That stupid little shot had been bleeding probably the entire way home for some reason, and I mean BLEEDING. I have never seen so much blood from 1 stupid little shot, okay 1 evil progesterone shot. No wonder why I was in pain. I lost half my blood supply though a tiny little hole! Please, March 3rd, can you be here already? I'm so done with these shots. Please?

Needle Count: 75
Acupuncture: 113

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Beating hearts baby.....

The doctor says, "There's one........................and there's two!" (Sorry the pic is sideways. Blogger won't load it right).

We're having TWINS!!!!

We got to see 2 beating and healthy hearts and hear 2 beating and healthy hearts. I laid on the table with tears of joy streaming down my face. I think I still have a perma-grin. It's so amazing. We honestly feel so blessed.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

In the bathroom stall.... again.

This weekend has been exciting with Ryan working. Since he's not home I have to find others to give me my shots. Friday night I went down to Elk Ridge to have The Mayor do my shot. My niece and nephew stood by the door and watched. I kept hearing my nephew say, "I can't watch it." He was cracking me up. I think he ended up hiding in the stairwell behind the wall so he couldn't see me anymore. I had to convince him that I was okay and I was brave.

Saturday night I ventured up to SLC with the girls. I told them I would only go if one of them would give me my shot. Dari quickly offered up nurse Sara because, well, she is a nurse afterall. We enjoyed dinner at P.F. Chang's and then off to the Gateway we went. We hurried and bought our movie tickets and then we ran to the bathroom so I could have yet again, a shot in the bathroom stall. Sara claimed she was nervous but she did an excellent job. Like I said before, hopefully this is the last time in a bathroom stall.

Thank goodness my nurse will be home with me tonight to give me my shot. I miss him when he works. He's just the best husband in the world. Last night when he got home from work at midnight I just kept whining that I wanted a piece of cheese and a pickle. He quickly went upstairs and got it for me. Cheese and pickles never tasted so good! Honestly, what would I do without him? He's amazing!

Needle count: 71
Acupuncture: 104

Wednesday, February 3, 2010


We want to hear from you! How many babies are there? We go in for an ultrasound on Tuesday, February 9, to find out. What's your guess? Vote using the poll on the sidebar!

Monday, February 1, 2010

In "the cottage," the car in the BYU parking lot, and in my parents bedroom. Again

This weekend was an eventful one! We celebrated our anniversary on Friday night with a visit to "the cottage" at La Caille. It was so nice to get away and just relax for a minute. Well, the shot had to come too of course. So, there I was at La Caille having my evil progesterone shot.

Saturday we were invited to the BYU game. I was excited to go until I realized I had to have a shot that night. It's never ending. Well, our options were to sneak a syringe into the Marriot Center or do the shot in the car. That's right, in the car it was in the middle of the parking lot. I parked between 2 huge vehicles and laid the seat back for maximum access. Um, awkward! I was just hoping nobody walked by and wondered what in the world was going on in there.

Sunday we had to go get Bella from Elk Ridge, therefore we had to do my shot again in my parent's bedroom. What an exciting weekend!

Now comes the real excitement. Ryan is starting to work nights this week so I now need volunteers for shots 3 times a week while he is gone. Molly, you're at the top of my list. Any other takers? I will need all the help I can get. Just think, I only have to do this for 1 more month. March 3, please come soon!

Needle count: 65
Acupuncture: 95